Help is available. If you are in suicidal crisis or emotional distress, please speak with someone today. Call (800-273-8255) or chat with someone at the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. Help is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
This post is the thirteenth in a series that shares my Divine team talk (conversations with and insights from my Divine team) since March 2020. (In case you missed it, you can find the first here.)
I have waffled about whether to include this entry on my blog, given that suicide is a tender subject. I am sharing this journal entry, however, trusting that my guides shared it with me to share with others.
1 June 2020
While I was meditating, my guides brought to me the notion of [someone’s] suicide. They showed me that the action did for [the person’s soul] what [the soul] intended, so it was “complete” in itself. For other people, the action, the event, was a catalyst for them to find or choose or enact their life’s purpose, whether working with [others at risk of suicide], speaking out about suicide, or something else. It’s not that [this person] or [this person’s] soul planned for the event to have these knock-on effects, but that it [the soul had] looked at what would accomplish its own needs and plans, and that was good—and if it could be helpful to others, so much the better, but that wasn’t vital.
I’m not sure why this was brought to my attention, but I will consider it. Perhaps it’s a reminder that we best help others by living our own best lives and doing what’s best for ourselves, and then those choices can be “turned” to good for others? That’s not quite right [I sense, and] is missing a shade or two of fine distinction.
So I will continue to ponder it.
***
This thought stayed with me through the following week as I considered the injuries and deaths around the world (especially in the US) caused by COVID and by authorities’ responses to protests and/or riots.
In the more than a year since this insight from my guides, I have also read several books from Dolores Cannon[1] that have touched on nearly every topic imaginable and given me enough varied perspectives to allow me to begin to feel even remotely “comfortable” creating this post and sharing my thoughts.
My Early Views
Starting when I was two or three years old, my life has been touched in various ways by suicide. I have known acquaintances, friends, and family members who have died from suicide.
Unfortunately, I have occasionally brought judgment, and judgment is rarely kind.
When I was very young and naive, I thought of suicide as a “coward’s way out.”
As I matured, I looked at suicide with more nuance. For a while, I thought suicide was an acceptable route for someone who was dying, to spare themselves the physical agony that was to come. I could easily forgive such people, for who would want to spend their last days suffering and having their loved ones see them suffer?
Closer to Home
My experiences after early adulthood, however, have given me a kinder eye and heart, and I am less prone to judge for any reason. I have felt physical pain so great that I have begged the Divine to end the pain or to “take me home.” And though I have never contemplated suicide, I once heard the command in my mind to kill myself with the knife that I was putting away after washing.
I did not act on that command, and in fact dropped the knife on the counter and walked away quickly, shaken. It has simply never been part of my physical or mental constitution to consider death as a best alternative, especially for myself.
Evolution of Judgment
As I have gained knowledge—and, I hope, wisdom—from studying world religions, spiritualities, and metaphysics; from seeing so many of the varied ways in which people live and die; and from trying to truly and deeply listen to people and feel what is in their hearts, I have come to hold no judgment about suicide.
What I do, however, is try to find reasons. Not to explain away, but to try to understand, so I can possibly help someone else—someone who is open to that help, or looking for another option.
One of my friends has a history of suicide within her family. I wanted her opinion about sharing this journal entry, and she was understandably confused, saying, “This is really weird to me. … When I read this I can’t tell if you mean that the suicides were inevitable because a person is born to walk a specific path or that you’re just trying to show that good can come from something awful. Or that suicide isn’t awful; it’s sometimes what the soul has to do.”
The answer—at least as I understand it from my studies and from my guides—is that there is nothing simple or easy about suicide. Whether it is awful or not is a human judgment. But suicide is never inevitable.
We Have Choices
We have free will on this world, so we can always choose to live. When planning our lives, we may choosen for certain things to happen no matter what. Or we may plan for certain things to happen if we fail to do certain things (like the option for a course correction). Not everything in life is planned for, and events that are completely unforeseen—even with the great access to wisdom and knowledge on the spirit side and in higher vibrational levels—can happen. This can bring us to life review or “exit points.”
Accidents
If an accident happens—a soul who had planned to be fully sighted for life has an accident in childhood that steals his sight, for example[2]—we can review and reassess. Such a review allows the soul the opportunity to decide whether to work within the contratins placed by this unforeseen turn of events, to turn the body over to another soul and start afresh in another body, or to leave this body and let it die completely.
Planned Exit Routes
Sometimes our souls actually plan for multiple possible exit points—you can think of them like freeway exit ramps that we may or may not reach, depending on the choices we make. When assessing our level of success, we can decide to leave because we’re WAY off course and it’s highly unlikely we would ever get back onto that course, so we “get off the ride” of life to start afresh in a new life. Or during that assessment, we may decide that we are a little off course and will keep trying. Or we may decide that we’re really off course but can maybe salvage things—perhaps by having a “near-death experience” to remember in our conscious lives that spurs us to perhaps restructure our lives completely.
The routes via which we can leave this life are infinite in number.
They are also infinite in reason.
No two options are the same.
Two people might die the same way, in the very same car accident, for example, but for different reasons.
The same is true of suicide.
Why Would Someone Choose Suicide?
Perhaps the soul had experienced all it came into this life to experience. Perhaps the soul had become too weighed down by the burden of life on this plane and needed the deep recovery offered in the spirit realm. Maybe the soul chose suicide rather than some other form of death for the possible wakeup that suicide would provide to other people. Or even to offer the opportunity for others to heal a soul-level karmic hurt that would not be able to be healed if this person died in an “accident.”
The reasons can be more complex than the limitations of our human minds allow us to understand.
But we always have a choice. On this planet, we always have free will.
Help is available. If you are in suicidal crisis or emotional distress, please speak with someone today. Call (800-273-8255) or chat with someone at the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. Help is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
***
Notes
[1] Cannon’s body of work is extensive and I have only begun to scratch the surface, but the books I have to read thus far are The Custodians: Beyond Abductions, Keepers of the Garden, The Three Waves of Volunteers and the New Earth, and The Convoluted Universe, Books One, Two, and Three.
[2] See Bob’s story in Chapter4, “Deafness and Blindness,” of Robert Schwartz’s Your Soul’s Plan.
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